So here are a few theories I've been working on and thought should share. This will probably be an on going post as new brilliance is created XP
The Neon Sign Theory
When you are single no one is interested but the second you have a significant other than the entire world finds the need to hit on you as if there is a big neon sign above your head that reads "I'm taken please tempt me!"
...Of Childhood Dreams
I truly believe that everyone as they're growing up should have an unrealistic dream and a realistic one. The unrealistic one that is for filled giving the person the idea that good things can happen to good people. Than the realistic one that is utterly shattered so that the person knows that shit can happen. This would bring about a perfect balance of optimism and pessimism, proving that miracles can happen with your help. "Fates got a lot to do, sometimes you must give her a hand"
The Equation of Life
A + B does not equal B + A
Therefore
A + C = (C + A) / B
Think about it. It makes perfect sense in terms of life.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
What's With Whitey?
OK I have been given full permission by my fully white friend to say all of the following, mainly because it's all true and party because she is exempt from it.
Why do white people always have cold hands? I don't know a single white person, that when I shake their hand I don't shiver.
Next, why in gods name do white people wash dishes with the yellow side of the sponge? There is a green abrasive side for a reason!
Why do white people put ketchup on EVERYTHING? Ketchup does not go on rice. It does not go on mac and cheese. It only goes on fries and sometimes burgers but nothing else! You need to stop putting concentrated corn syrup on prime rib, you are ruining it!
Why do white people prove southern stereo types true? Lay off the random explosives, incest, and obtuse right wing religious views. It will make the world a better place. And on that note, "If Jesus were alive today, we would kill him with lethal injection. I call that progress. We would have to kill him for the same reason he was killed the first time: His ideas are just too liberal." Kurt Vonngeut.
And this blog is tbc...
Why do white people always have cold hands? I don't know a single white person, that when I shake their hand I don't shiver.
Next, why in gods name do white people wash dishes with the yellow side of the sponge? There is a green abrasive side for a reason!
Why do white people put ketchup on EVERYTHING? Ketchup does not go on rice. It does not go on mac and cheese. It only goes on fries and sometimes burgers but nothing else! You need to stop putting concentrated corn syrup on prime rib, you are ruining it!
Why do white people prove southern stereo types true? Lay off the random explosives, incest, and obtuse right wing religious views. It will make the world a better place. And on that note, "If Jesus were alive today, we would kill him with lethal injection. I call that progress. We would have to kill him for the same reason he was killed the first time: His ideas are just too liberal." Kurt Vonngeut.
And this blog is tbc...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
